Travel Plans

It has been a whirlwind of a day...

Chad and I ran errands from 9am to 4pm today trying to get all the paperwork together for our trip.

As a quick summary, we each saw our doctors for signed medical forms stating we are healthy enough to adopt (whew...) :)  - had those notarized - had them state sealed. We filled out our tourist visa applications (a visa is required to get into Ghana- in addition to a passport) which of course required our full travel itinerary so we booked our flights (see more below)!  Then we got passport photos taken (for the visas) -  super rush/overnight mailed our visa applications, travel itinerary and $400 to the consulate (praying they print tomorrow and overnight them back here by Saturday...or else we miss our flights).

We leave from JFK airport this Monday night! We will arrive in Ghana Tuesday night and be there for 5 nights, back next week Monday/Tuesday. At this point, i cant find a flight from anywhere in Michigan to JFK for a price worth considering (currently they are $700+ each) so we are considering driving. Which seems crazy with how little time we have.

Whew...my head is spinning with everything that has to be done. While I know it will all come together this feels very chaotic and unorganized...which are two things that are generally difficult for me ;)... Keep us all in your prayers! Thanks!

We're goin to Ghana!!!

We barely believe what is about to be typed...

Just this morning, we received an email from our caseworker informing us that our custody court date in Ghana has been scheduled!!!  "When?" (you might be asking).

...for next week Friday...

WHAT!?!?!?!?

I know, right???

We are heading to Ghana in 7 days! 

We will meet our son in 9 days!

We could legally be parents in 10 days!

We totally thought this part of the process would take longer (whatever! We have known this was coming for over a year- (its kinda like when people say that Christmas snuck up on them...) that's just silly)...we thought we would have more notice on our court date (you know I am totally freaking out right now!)...but in reality this is just about right. :)

Isnt this how God works?

The weekend we are scheduled to have what could be our biggest fundraiser yet, is the same weekend we will need to book two last minute flights to Ghana costing somewhere in the ball park of $4000+. We have always had just enough, just in time...

Stay tuned!

It's a........BOY!!!

The words we have been waiting to type!!! We have finally received a referral for a 4 year old boy in Ghana! Wahoo!!!!

Do the happy dance…ya….ya…do the happy dance…!!!

Ok, so you might be asking, “What, I thought Ghana had suspended their adoption program….i thought this was impossible”? Well, the easy answer is yes and yes but we will get to that part later.

But first, more about our little (big) guy! His name is Kweku Rahit Abubakar. He has been living in orphanages for a while as he was abandoned by his father as a baby and more recently left at the Department of Social Welfare by his mother, who since has been unable to be located.

He is said to be “exceptionally bright” and is now staying at a well known and caring orphanage in the Central Region.  We received two pictures of him and words cannot describe how adorable he is. Each picture tells a very different story of the challenges he has faced already in his little life. There is so much to discover in those dark eyes. Unfortunately, it is illegal to share photos electronically until after we pass court and doing so could jeopardize our adoption so im sorry, but many of you will have to wait to see his beautiful face (or you can just come for a visit as he is hanging on our fridge)!

Now we wait for confirmation that our Placement Letter has been filed. This is the document that is submitted to the court in Ghana were we specifically request to adopt Kewku. This will trigger our court date being set. We are hoping for a court date in September and will plan to go to represent ourselves. This is somewhat uncommon as an agency’s Power of Attorney typically goes on behalf of families but after consulting with them we have decided that it may look better for us to be there.

After that we should be able to get updates and pictures more regularly  as it is common courtesy when you are visiting Ghana to offer to take pictures/videos of other people’s children.

Ok, so back to the less fun part of this…the process, politics and pursuit.

The moment we heard about Kweku and received his information we both experienced incredible peace about moving forward. We were the only family still on the waiting list in Ghana. Some felt called to something different, we felt called to stay. We knew there was a reason and now we believe that it was Kweku.

It seems to be a miracle that we even received a referral with how rocky things are in Ghana. He is fortunate to be from one of the few regions still pushing adoptions through where the Social Welfare Director has spoken outwardly about his belief in and commitment to international adoption as one option for orphaned children.  Its God confirming again how big He truly is.

So even as we ask you to celebrate this huge step with us and we say we have so much peace about moving forward, something dark tells me not to get too excited, not to get other people excited, because so many things could still go wrong. Technically the suspension is still in place. There are people along the way that seem to be doing everything in their power to prevent or at least delay children from coming home even after the adoption is considered final. There are many huge and terrifying mountains ahead. The truth is that not many people seem to know exactly what is going on. Some say only one agency in the US is able to continue processing adoptions (not the agency we are with), some say we may need an international adoption attorney, some just say “your crazy for doing this at all”.

But…

Although we will face seemingly impossible mountains, walk many uncertain and rocky roads, see dark days, probably be tempted to feel hopeless or to jump at quick decisions that help us feel more in control, the real TRUTH is that our God, the one who loved Kweku before he was even conceived, can see around every mountain and to the end of every rocky road. He will be Light in the darkness and the One that we will continue to put all of our trust and faith in. Our hope will not be found in politics, process or people.

So while there is a tiny part of me that is nervous to tell you all about Kweku because I cant imagine having to tell you if something goes wrong, its more important to me that you know so that you can continue to pray. Some specific prayer requests are:

·      Clear guidance, that our hearts and minds would be open to whatever God is calling us to, that worry would be shut out by faith and that we will daily give up trying to control any of this and put it all squarely in God’s hands.

·      Protection, provision and health for Kweku.

·      That even now, God would begin to work in his little heart, preparing him for what lies ahead and healing the emotional/psychological hurts he has already unfairly endured.

·      The financial means for us to do whatever it takes to bring him home. God has already provided every step of the way and we are confident that He will continue to do so.

Thanks for your ongoing support and love! It means more to us than you know. Happy 4th of July!

Starting over...

I tried really hard to title this post something different. 

I have been debating it all day. I wanted my fingers to type something like: "A fresh start" or "Unwavering" or even "Explosive trust and quiet resolve". That's a good one.

But they typed the truth- straight up. 

We are starting over. 

Ghana officially suspended their international adoption program on May 13. Smart people doubt that the suspension will be lifted...ever, i guess. I wish I could eloquently list all their reasons but to be honest I just dont know what they are. Some imply that it is to push internal reform and promote domestic adoption. Maybe. But then I ask, what about all the children who are sitting in orphanages today, waiting, while 'they' debate reform? Arent they concerned about what happens in the in between time?

I am upset. Angry actually. Once again, children are the pawns in a political game. 

I am sad. Is mourning too strong of a word? I feel like I have lost something, something that I was quite attached to: an idea, a picture in a my head, the child ive bought clothes for. A friend said that what I am feeling may be similar to what someone dealing with  a miscarriage may experience. Humans just attach to other humans, sometimes rather quickly, sometimes before they even meet each other. It's a fact.

So, where do we go from here? After talking through all of our options and really trying to figure out what God is doing here (and wishing we actually knew) we have decided to be added to the waiting list for Ethiopia. We will leave our dossier (that really big stack of paperwork) in Ghana in case things change and we will begin compiling a new dossier for Ethiopia.

We really never thought we would go there, for lots of reasons. We have felt so drawn to the west side of Africa. We know nothing about Ethiopia.

The facts are still the same though. It is a poor, war-torn, disease-ravaged country. There are many, many orphans. Because programs in Ethiopia have been "popular" there is a long waiting list (we are somewhere in the 50's I believe) but we are told there are few who are willing to consider an "older child" (over the age of 3) or a child with special needs (like HIV) or even sibling sets. So, that is exactly what we are open to. Maybe things will move quickly! Maybe they wont. 

Here's to the first step!!

~

 "I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you"- John 14:18

~

"Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you"

 - James 1:27

A little somthin' about being stuck

Wow, its been a while... I find myself repeatedly saying "Ill write a blog post as soon as _______ (fill in the blank) happens because it will make for a great read". Then several weeks go by and something weird happens...i dont write ANYTHING. Not because things arent happening and changing or because I am not thinking things, my brain rarely stops (melatonin has become my friend!).

Chad and I recently went to see the film "Stuck".

Powerful.

Heartbreaking.

Enraging.

Emotionally draining.

Just a few words that describe the experience. If you havent seen it, PLEASE do. Its more than a movie, its a bright light shining on a very hidden social justice issue. The film is finishing up its international tour on the East coast this week and finally arriving in DC on Thursday to present 30,000 signatures (hopefully! (you signed it right?)) to congress followed by countless meetings with legislators and representatives wrapped up with a march on Capital Hill.

This movement is about changing the way the world does international adoption. As Chad and I have been in this journey we have learned SO much about what is happening (and not!) behind the scenes. The corruption, politics and red tape makes me physically sick because I know its at the cost of innocent children. 1 of which dies every 30 seconds from preventable causes. Ugh.

Over the last several weeks we have been getting bits of information here and there about the new Minister of Gender, Children and Social Protection in Ghana and her persuasion and impact on the processing of international adoptions.  We heard from one source that she advised a cease in adoption petitions being signed until major reform can take place and as a result many regional social welfare directors have halted all pending cases. Apparently she is a determined lady because word has it that she has already fired some of her staff for insubordination.  To be clear though, no laws have changed making international adoption illegal and furthermore, she doesn't have the legal authority to do so.

Now to be clear, I dont think that international adoption should be the only option for a child and reform IS needed. Badly! There should be many options available for each orphan and whichever one gets them out of an institution and into a safe, loving family the quickest should be pursued. But seriously...halting everything to reform the system literally means that many waiting children will have NO HOPE for a family. Every day that goes by, every year older a child turns, their chances of being adopted plummet. Its just the truth. The hard truth.

So here is where we beg for your help!

1. Continue to pray for orphans all over the world, for them to be safe and comforted and provided for. Pray for softened hearts for our leaders all over the world. What a heavy weight of power they hold.

2. Sign the petition. Join Chad and I in demanding change. We cannot be idle now. We will not be quiet.

3. Get involved. There are so many ways. One place to start is to watch the film (you can borrow it from us!). Then tell a friend about it. And make sure you both sign the petition! :)

He's Alive and I'm Forgiven!

"There is nothing to fear here. I know you're looking for Jesus, the One they nailed to the cross. He is not here. He was raised, just as He said. Come and look at the place where he was placed." 

Matthew 28:5-6

It is a beautiful day! Even though it's a bit cloudy and cold here is West Michigan we are reminded of the promise of spring. A fresh start.

 Christ took all of our sin to the cross, even the ones we haven't yet committed or aren't even aware of! All the sin of the past, present and future. How heavy it must have been... His sacrifice ensured that you and I could be covered by grace and be blameless before God.

Even though this is truly a day of joy I find that my heart is still so heavy.

For so many things. For so many people. For those around me who are experiencing unimaginable pain, those who are drifting without purpose, and especially for those who are alone. During this morning's service I found myself thinking about my little one. Wondering if he is alone. Praying that he hasn't given up on crying out because he thinks no one is coming. Hoping that every cell of his little body feels God's presence and protection.  Even though I long for him and pray for his safety constantly, I am comforted knowing that my God loves him even more. He is not my son, he is God's son. And there is no greater love.

So I am both overflowing with joy and ripping apart with pain. How do both exist together?

I guess that is what Christ promises his followers. Not that it would be easy or that we would not feel pain but that knowing the One Truth would give us hope. So that we can know that this world is only the beginning and that there is so much more to come. All the while, we are to engage in the brokenness, and live where injustice and darkness are bountiful.

I hold on to that hope. My joy is renewed with every reminder that the stone has been rolled away and the tomb is empty.

I know that my Redeemer lives!!!

The Great Wait Debate

I decided earlier today that I wanted to blog tonight. Then I got home, ate dinner, did the dishes and got tired. I have been battling a cold for what seems like eternity and I just didn't feel inspired. I didn't feel like writing.

So I read. A good friend recently gave me a copy of "Draw the Circle: The 40 Day Prayer Challenge"(Mark Batterson). I am a sucker for two things: a challenge and a good cause. The title of this book seemed to throw a little bit of both at me. The challenge for today was "Don't Pray Away". The quick and dirty is that we too often pray 'get me out' prayers, asking for our circumstances to change when sometimes we should be praying 'get me through' prayers and asking for change within ourselves. Hmmm. Surprisingly, this parallels something else that has been on my mind the last few days. Something that I have equally little discernment in.

How do you know when you are supposed to take a step in faith and 

when you are supposed to wait for God to make the way clear? 

I am afraid that too many people wait for too long for far too many things. If only 8% of the world's "Christians" adopted an orphan, the orphan crisis would be over...that statistic alone proves that we wait, process, doubt and over analyze ourselves to death. Literally. Sometimes I wonder if God is ever 'up there' screaming at us to JUST DO SOMETHING!!! I agree with Mr. Batterson that trying and missing is better than never trying at all.

On the other hand, my wonderful husband recently reminded me of the story of Abraham and Sarah and how they wanted a child so badly for soooo long that they took matters into their own hands by having Sarah's maid be the one to get pregnant. They veered off the path a bit and God still kept His promise and Sarah had a baby...it just came a little later and under slightly different circumstances. Then there are the infamous Israelites who wondered around in the dessert aimlessly for 40 years. Each time their faith got rattled they too took matters into their own hands and so they got to wonder around some more. I (like Batterson) don't want my shortsighted-ness to short-curciut God's perfect plan.

So this is the dilemma. All the waiting families were invited to a conference call on Tuesday with the staff who have just returned from an extended trip in Ghana. Overall, the message was positive. They made some new relationships with orphanage directors and strengthened old ones.  At the same time, there was a very clear message that things aren't progressing as quickly as they had hoped, the understanding and support of international adoption isn't as developed as they would like and the children who are currently waiting (that their single staff person in Ghana is aware of) are older or have special needs. This was all to emphasize their point that this is still going to be a long process...

So what does that mean for us? It could be days, it could be months before we get that phone call? Do we sit back and wait patiently, trusting that God's timing is always better than ours? OR do we step out in faith even further and employ some of our newly developed connections (that God gave us for a reason) to search for a waiting child on our own. Is God wanting to grow us by waiting or has His leading been clear enough? Either way I can be at peace. I just want to know.

I just don't know if my heart can break much more for the lonely little boy who is out there waiting for someone to come to him. Waiting for us.