Last, first and free

Today is my last. 

Tomorrow is my first. 

And a few days ago we were set free.

TODAY

I broke a new record!!! My first day at Arbor Circle was April 25, 2011. I worked there full-time for 3 years, 3 months and 11 days. And while I will stay on contractually (very part-time) for a while yet, I am not "there" any more. I learned an incredible amount about myself and my "style", about some of the things that hold families and youth down and about the challenges that keeps support services from doing all they have the capacity to do. It changed me. I now have a lot more experience, a healthy amount of skepticism and a stronger (maybe unbreakable) passion to keep pushing forward.

TOMORROW

Tomorrow I start something new! The next chapter. I will be am the Director of HQ, a drop in center for youth who are experiencing homelessness, who have run away or who are just struggling. The dream of starting something from the ground up, pouring my vision and passion (my everything) into it,  being a part of something big that was going to have a lasting impact, has been just that: a dream. Maybe something that would happen in 10 or 20 years. Maybe in another country. But here I am. People believe in me. A lot of people. I cant even describe how that feels. I am humbled...so honored....so shocked by it all. I have moments where I freak out a little bit and ask myself when everyone around me is going to realize that I cant do it. I had just had one of those moments before I read the Jesus Calling devotion today, which told me: 

"Rest in My sufficiency, as you consider the challenges this day presents. Do not wear yourself out by worrying about whether you can cope with the presures. Keep looking to me and communicating with Me, as we walk thru this together."

I dont have to be perfect. I dont even have to pretend like I am! I can just put my all into every day knowing that every step of my life has been led, at every turn I have been molded and shaped and I wont be alone now (or tomorrow!). Interviewing for this job was one of the biggest tests of my faith. I'd been fully on one side of the pendulum: I wanted it SO bad, it was my dream, what else would I do... and the other side: maybe I shouldnt even apply, I probably won't get it anyway, I don't know if I'm ready. Then, as the interview process came closer I found the middle. I gave up control. No, really. I did!!! Why is that so hard to believe?? :) I felt so at peace. I gave it to God and told Him I would honestly live either way. :) If I got it I would step 100 million percent into it...if I didnt, i would look forward to what He was preparing me for. 

Deep breath. 

Then I got it!!!

And the "crazy train" leaves the station tomorrow! Woohoo!!!

And- Chad's job is going so great too! He absolutely loves it. He is learning a ton, being challenged (personally and professionally) and gaining confidence ever day. I am so proud of him for taking the risk and working hard!!!

Ok, so adoption update: basically it continues to drag on at the pace of a elderly snail. Last Thursday we mailed out the 3rd packet of supporting documents to US immigration, in response to the Notice of Intent to Deny Kwe immigration. Our Officer received it yesterday. Maybe we will hear something in the next week.

The day after we sent it, Chad sent me a text sharing a "God download". I dont know if you have ever experienced that but for me, it's in the stillness (when I can actually figure out how to make my mind pause) and its usually a simple word or a few words that just enter my mind. There's nothing and then  there's something. 

So anyway, this is it. It touched us so deeply that we couldn't not share it with you! Enjoy!

"I have Kwe in my arms, right where I need him to be. Have peace knowing he's in my care. I'm instilling in him character and a passion for my people. I need him here for a time such as this to learn and grow. The future for him will be much more brighter because of this! Rest assured my child for I know the plans I have for him and for you!"